As a sinner, there was one guy that I met several years ago that stayed in my heart for what I thought was going to be forever. At one point I honestly thought I loved him. My feelings were all mixed up in lust and infatuation. I can’t begin to tell how many times I prayed to be “delivered” from him, or prayed that God would take away my desire to be with him. This guy was goodly to look at. He was intelligent, well-rounded, funny, and driven. I cared a lot about him, and he said he cared a lot about me.
Prior to accepting Christ, I would tongue lash him (to say the least) and tell him I didn’t want anything else to do with him; but each time he called me or texted me my heart would melt. Or times that he didn’t call or text I would contact because I missed him. I jokingly used to sing the old school tune “you really got a hold on me” as I walked throughout my home. Unbeknownst to me I was actually in a strong hold, but more importantly I was in spiritual warfare.
I’ve not found the term “Soul Tie” in the Bible. However, 1 Cor. Chapter 6 v. 16 tells us that we “become one” with whom we become intimate. The person we become one with should be our spouses. This guy and I were fornicators together, which is how the tie developed. After years of not understanding why I could not shake feelings for this guy I became hopeless. There were times that I was depressed because I felt bound: bound emotionally to a guy that made me feel bad and bound spiritually to a strong hold that I did not realize I had the power to overcome in Christ Jesus. Almost a year ago I wrote “What a Soul Tie Feels Like.” After spending some time with God I had to go back and revise that. I changed it to “What the WRONG Soul Tie feels like.” Here’s what I listed:
After I began to seek God, my hopelessness met hopefulness. I thought “God, if I can feel this way about someone who you have not purposed to be my husband, the concept will be something beautiful when I meet my husband;(our feelings will be mutual, and our souls will be tied to each other).” As I said, my soul was tied for several years. It was a wrestle. Even as a Christian I vacillated often. One day God told me that I cannot have both. I couldn’t be in a fruitful relationship with Him and maintain the unequally yoked relationship with my soul tie. I chose God. I made up in my mind and heart that I did not want to go out like a sucker as it related to this soul tie. I repented and prayed asking God to change my heart. I got into the scriptures and read what God said about unequally yoked relationships and lust. My mind was renewed. I went into the presence of God, and after coming out shortly thereafter the guy contacted me and for the first time I told him “no.” Honestly, that was difficult for me. I was rattled. I thought “I just came out of the presence of God and here goes Satan. He just barely gave me time to re-up!” But I believe from the core of my being that my willingness to submit to the will of God and ACT on what he told me in my spirit and his Word was a stepping stone towards my deliverance. Today I am able to testify that I am free. And OMG it is a lovely feeling.
I would not advise or encourage anyone to have sex out of marriage because the repercussions are GRAVE (Romans 6:23). The scriptures bear witness that we as humans are affected by whom we chose to give ourselves to (1 Cor. 6:16). The Bible tells us to Flee Youthful Lust. (2 Tim. 2:22) It also says that it is not good for a man to touch a woman (1 Cor. 7:1). Touching leads to other things. I do advise those who may be in a soul tie now to seek deliverance from God because it is not something you can do on your own. Look to God for strength and allow him to lead you to victory.
Grace and Peace,